There is a lot of talk about what is new in change initiatives. Far less about what is being lost.
○ A reorganization may mean the end of a team.
○ A change in leadership may mean losing a familiar working relationship.
○ A new strategy may mean the end of a project someone has invested five years in.
○ Growth may mean losing a close-knit culture that people valued.
The new direction can be the right one and still feel like a loss. Because fundamental things are changing: belonging, influence, routines. An idea of what the future was once supposed to look like.
Grieving something does not automatically mean rejecting the change. But whatever is being grieved mattered.
If there is no room for saying goodbye in the change process, people will fill that gap themselves. They do the work of honoring and remembering that had no official place. That is when the stories about “the old days” emerge. Quietly or loudly. In meetings or by the coffee machine.
What’s then interpreted as nostalgia or resistance may also be a goodbye that was never given a place.
Those responsible for leading change can easily skip this step. The pressure to move forward is high. They are already focused on the future and grappling with the difficult path to get there. And they themselves have usually been living for weeks with the reality that something is going to change.
For many others, the process of letting go only begins with the announcement.
That is why, for me, a good change narrative needs to address not only where we are going, but also what’s coming to an end along the way. And why.
This does not require elaborate farewell rituals. Often, a few small but genuine steps are enough:
→ name what’s ending
→ sincerely acknowledge what has been achieved
→ ask in a meeting: “What will we miss?”
→ as a leader, speak about your own sense of loss instead of only projecting confidence
“What, exactly, is ending here?”
